Will somebody please hire me already???

I mean, come on! I keep applying for these government positions, and I haven’t heard anything (except for the one job I didn’t get). It’s such a pain applying for these jobs – enough already! Someone just give me a job! I’m smart, right? Creative, am I not? Provide color in the work environment, yes? I know the speed at which the government works, but I’m getting a little impatient here.

I need money! I need benefits! I need my own office that I can decorate with Sea Monkeys and Life In Hell cartoons (ok, I might even settle for my own cubicle). I want to move out of my uncle’s house before he comes back and discovers that my cat has been peeing on the carpet in his hallway!!! I can live with being an aquatic biologist or ecologist or even a fish-type scientist, but if you know of any position opening up that pays really well and involves petting cats and watching tv, please let me know! Because clearly this is what I’m most qualified for… (and those darn government hiring people know it!).

4 thoughts on “Will somebody please hire me already???

  1. Marci,As a current Federal Slacker, I gotta say that no news is good news. The feds have a great ability of telling you when you are not needed. If you hear nothing, it only means that you are being considered. How many times have I been in your shoes over the past year? Things will work out and you will land a kush job in the government. No news is good news!P

  2. As a retiree, I can offer you no solace about the government world of jobs, but I would like to say I wasn’t distracted by your working plea from the fact that you like having a cat and are into fish. There’s something… uh, fishy there!But, I have no doubt that once a government official sees your job, you will find your employment efforts rewarded. (Chinese fortune cookie, without the obligatory “…in bed” at the end.)eNik

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